My recent dream is represented here and I will offer commentary as interpretation.
Dream journal
On a trip with some friends. In like a mall type area. I'm going to a movie.
I did recently go to a movie with friends and it was near a mall. This part and the entire dream resemble Wreck it Ralph a bit in structure and appearance.
It takes a long time to get there. I get distracted in the middle of the movie and have to go somewhere else. As I'm separated from the group, I'm traveling around this small town, but there are indicators of where I am at and where my friend is at. I see her name like on a locator indicator type thing like on a smartphone.
I see this as my education. It did take me a long time and I got distracted a lot along the way. The friend is one who I recently saw a movie with.
A few times I've traveled by car, often with my family. One time I get to the car and we all pile in. It's usually been a very small car with weird places to sit.
Very recently I was with another group of friends and we all got into a smaller car and traveled a short distance together. I see the driving sequences as who is in charge.
One time I get in the back and travel. Another more recent time, I get in the back, but then realize there is a spot up front but still in the passenger seat. My mother is in the seat behind me and my father is driving the car. My brother is next to my mom and the guy who rents a room here is in the back where I once was.
I am wanting to take control of life, but maybe I'm not ready yet.
At one point, I'm at an arcade and playing all of these games. I watch people playing the games. You go behind this screen and play the games and everyone can watch you playing. I see people playing and then I play the games. I am pretty good at them.
This reminds me of Ender's Game a bit. I am playing these simulations and I think it's just a game, but I eventually realize the games are very important and I am extremely good at them. I equate this again to education. I am taking for granted how much I can do and how smart I am, but I end up being really good at this game.
One of them are these animals that go around smashing and eating things. You have three animals and they go around the board that seems to physically be there. A few of them are large cartoon cats, like Sylvester the cat from Looney Tunes. I am doing really well and it takes a while for one of my cats to die. I keep going and going. In anytime during the game, you can stop and just take your points, but you can try and revive a cat when it dies. I keep reviving mine and go for a really long time.
At any time during my education process, I could have just said, I gave it a shot, let's call it a day, but I didn't. I see this as finally realizing how good I can be at this.
By the end of the game I have a lot of points. It's supposed to pay out like $630, but I get some vouchers. I get a few really expensive video games, but they are broken in half and the cases are cracked. The other prize is a voucher for money to play more games. I feel kind of ripped off.
I feel like my education that I worked so hard for does not have any value in the real world. I worked so hard for a promised that is really not as good as expected. I fear losing all that time and it was wasted maybe.
I get in another car or I try to. The cars have been in odd places. Once a car was traveling down the road and I think my mother was driving, or maybe my father. We went down an escalator and I said maybe we shouldn't do that in a car. The cops or security for the train station stop us and tell us not to do that. I go back to the video game place to check out.
I know what I'm doing, but others are getting me lost. They mean well, but I know where to go and need to take the driver's seat.
My brother is there but people are frantically leaving, holding game chips, tokens, and broken games as they leave, running away as they do in some cases. I find out most of winning are gone, but they wouldn't mean anything anyway, since the store is closing. I'm not really that upset.
I've come to terms with my education not being as valuable as I was promised, or at least come to grips with that possibility. It doesn't upset me as much as I think it would have.
I turn around in place a few times and then at a running jump I start flying through the air with stars trailing behind me. I'm going really fast and now I'm singing Price's Purple Rain. I see all the land I just covered and I'm really happy, flying through the dark sky at night, singing Purple Rain, with stars of light trailing behind me.
Who cares if it's a useless degree? I had fun, I met the coolest people that I have until this point to add to already great friends, who have been there, too. The last two years have been the most amazing of my life and things will never be the same, all in a very good way. I think I'm going to take a shower and take a walk. This was kind of an amazing dream...
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Dream Journal 5/22/13
Dream journal
On a trip with some friends. In like a mall type area. I'm going to a movie. It takes a long time to get there. I get distracted in the middle of the movie and have to go somewhere else. As I'm separated from the group, I'm traveling around this small town, but there are indicators of where I am at and where my friend is at. I see her name like on a locator indicator type thing like on a smartphone. A few times I've traveled by car, often with my family. One time I get to the car and we all pile in. It's usually been a very small car with weird places to sit. One time I get in the back and travel. Another more recent time, I get in the back, but then realize there is a spot up front but still in the passenger seat. My mother is in the seat behind me and my father is driving the car. My brother is next to my mom and the guy who rents a room here is in the back where I once was.
At one point, I'm at an arcade and playing all of these games. I watch people playing the games. You go behind this screen and play the games and everyone can watch you playing. I see people playing and then I play the games. I am pretty good at them. One of them are these animals that go around smashing and eating things. You have three animals and they go around the board that seems to physically be there. A few of them are large cartoon cats, like Sylvester the cat from Looney Tunes. I am doing really well and it takes a while for one of my cats to die. I keep going and going. In anytime during the game, you can stop and just take your points, but you can try and revive a cat when it dies. I keep reviving mine and go for a really long time.
By the end of the game I have a lot of points. It's supposed to pay out like $630, but I get some vouchers. I get a few really expensive video games, but they are broken in half and the cases are cracked. The other prize is a voucher for money to play more games. I feel kind of ripped off. I get in another car or I try to. The cars have been in odd places. Once a car was traveling down the road and I think my mother was driving, or maybe my father. We went down an escalator and I said maybe we shouldn't do that in a car. The cops or security for the train station stop us and tell us not to do that. I go back to the video game place to check out.
My brother is there but people are frantically leaving, holding game chips, tokens, and broken games as they leave, running away as they do in some cases. I find out most of winning are gone, but they wouldn't mean anything anyway, since the store is closing. I'm not really that upset. I turn around in place a few times and then at a running jump I start flying through the air with stars trailing behind me. I'm going really fast and now I'm singing Price's Purple Rain. I see all the land I just covered and I'm really happy, flying through the dark sky at night, singing Purple Rain, with stars of light trailing behind me.
On a trip with some friends. In like a mall type area. I'm going to a movie. It takes a long time to get there. I get distracted in the middle of the movie and have to go somewhere else. As I'm separated from the group, I'm traveling around this small town, but there are indicators of where I am at and where my friend is at. I see her name like on a locator indicator type thing like on a smartphone. A few times I've traveled by car, often with my family. One time I get to the car and we all pile in. It's usually been a very small car with weird places to sit. One time I get in the back and travel. Another more recent time, I get in the back, but then realize there is a spot up front but still in the passenger seat. My mother is in the seat behind me and my father is driving the car. My brother is next to my mom and the guy who rents a room here is in the back where I once was.
At one point, I'm at an arcade and playing all of these games. I watch people playing the games. You go behind this screen and play the games and everyone can watch you playing. I see people playing and then I play the games. I am pretty good at them. One of them are these animals that go around smashing and eating things. You have three animals and they go around the board that seems to physically be there. A few of them are large cartoon cats, like Sylvester the cat from Looney Tunes. I am doing really well and it takes a while for one of my cats to die. I keep going and going. In anytime during the game, you can stop and just take your points, but you can try and revive a cat when it dies. I keep reviving mine and go for a really long time.
By the end of the game I have a lot of points. It's supposed to pay out like $630, but I get some vouchers. I get a few really expensive video games, but they are broken in half and the cases are cracked. The other prize is a voucher for money to play more games. I feel kind of ripped off. I get in another car or I try to. The cars have been in odd places. Once a car was traveling down the road and I think my mother was driving, or maybe my father. We went down an escalator and I said maybe we shouldn't do that in a car. The cops or security for the train station stop us and tell us not to do that. I go back to the video game place to check out.
My brother is there but people are frantically leaving, holding game chips, tokens, and broken games as they leave, running away as they do in some cases. I find out most of winning are gone, but they wouldn't mean anything anyway, since the store is closing. I'm not really that upset. I turn around in place a few times and then at a running jump I start flying through the air with stars trailing behind me. I'm going really fast and now I'm singing Price's Purple Rain. I see all the land I just covered and I'm really happy, flying through the dark sky at night, singing Purple Rain, with stars of light trailing behind me.
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Willingly Lost (Poem)
Listening to Michael Jackson's Dirty Diana today and I was inspired to right a poem to the rhythm of the verses. I threw a few lines that fit the poem in there, but the words here are mostly mine.
I can't stop thinking of you
I wish that you'd go away
I can't stop picturing your face
It follows me every place.
I've been here times before
But I was too blind to see
That you seduce every man
This time you won't seduce me.
It seems my mind's filled with you
I wish you'd come be with me.
Maybe it's true that won't be
But I wish it could be true.
This torture's tearing me apart
And quickly breaking my heart.
I make pretend that you don't
Drive me completely insane.
You say, "You don't know me.
How could you possibly be
In love with little old me?"
But I know that I do.
I think it's you who don't know me
How I could possibly feel.
You're not inside my head
With all these pictures of you.
And I don't care what you say
I want to go too far.
I promised an absence of passion,
But it seems I lied about that.
'Cause I'm in love with you now
Though that doesn't make sense.
I'm left the same place I started
Stuck in a trap that I made.
I wanted to have a brave face.
I want to forget about you.
But I can't lie to myself
This won't fade away fast.
I wish that I had the strength
To say I don't care about you.
But that'd be lying you see
And I can't do that to me.
I can't stop thinking of you
I wish that you'd go away
I can't stop picturing your face
It follows me every place.
I've been here times before
But I was too blind to see
That you seduce every man
This time you won't seduce me.
It seems my mind's filled with you
I wish you'd come be with me.
Maybe it's true that won't be
But I wish it could be true.
This torture's tearing me apart
And quickly breaking my heart.
I make pretend that you don't
Drive me completely insane.
You say, "You don't know me.
How could you possibly be
In love with little old me?"
But I know that I do.
I think it's you who don't know me
How I could possibly feel.
You're not inside my head
With all these pictures of you.
And I don't care what you say
I want to go too far.
I promised an absence of passion,
But it seems I lied about that.
'Cause I'm in love with you now
Though that doesn't make sense.
I'm left the same place I started
Stuck in a trap that I made.
I wanted to have a brave face.
I want to forget about you.
But I can't lie to myself
This won't fade away fast.
I wish that I had the strength
To say I don't care about you.
But that'd be lying you see
And I can't do that to me.
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